Home Again

This weekend, Mother returned to her apartment, Harry relaxed again at home, and Dora continued to work on walking so she can soon go home. Dora, we are all cheering for you to get better.

Mother's energy is still very low. We are not sure why she continues to be so tired, and hope to figure this out soon. She did get some good news that she can stop the daily shots and daily blood work. She will still have to check her blood regularly, and the next appointment for this is June 19th.

Right now, it is still best to communicate with her by mail or email so she can respond when she has some energy. She goes to bed very early and takes naps during the day.

In the meantime, thanks so much to Joan Baird, Lorraine Aiken, and Ann Foltz for your attentiveness to Mother, and to Joan and Lorraine for tracking down Dora's mother's potato soup recipe (coming soon with a story about Dora). And thanks to Stevie for watering plants and taking the paper inside.

Honey and the Giving Joy to Others House

Last Saturday, my nephew Scott graduated from high school. When I really think about this, it is almost impossible to get my head around the concept. It was only yesterday that he and Seth played Go Fish with some girlie cards they found in a closet at Honey and Ken's house. Mother and Daddy had just moved to Simmons Mountain, and they were somewhat excited themselves that the Ling's horses were loose in their front yard. Naive that anything could absorb the boys attention more than six horses grazing, they called, and called, and called to Scott and Seth. Finally, the boys indulged them and peeked through the shutters with polite inattention. It stumped Mother and Daddy, but they continued to watch the horses. Scott and Seth continued to Go Fish, and were moving cards at such a pace that Mother and Daddy remained at the window and enjoyed more simple pleasures. The innocence of childhood and the short attention of youth left cards strewn, and the mysterious behavior bared.

The girlie cards disappeared, and for a few years, the boys riffled through the closet shelves, until their own memory of the game faded. Sometimes we tell them this story, and they grin.

Honey looked forward to Scott's graduation, and wanted to attend. Early last Saturday, she hoped that she could be released from Memorial Hospital early enough to stop by Brad's house after the ceremony and spend a few minutes with Scott. Mother was ready to leave Memorial Hospital by 10:00 a.m., but it was not meant to be. I don't remember what time we left, but it was afternoon, and Mother was so tired. We both had a lot of anxiety about the transition from the hospital to health care, but neither of us dreamed that Dora Rice was in our future. Dora is Mother's roommate, and we had such a treat in store.

Life is full of simple joys, and ultimately, it is the creative spirit in each of us that gives us the hope to connect across politics, religion, and race. My mother is very tired right now. I am still telling the story of last Saturday as we almost touch tomorrow's Saturday, and Mother is still tired. Brad and I have relied on Patti to call us when Mother has side effects from the coumadin, low heart rate, or any other need.

I rely on Brad and Patti to visit her each day and call me with any news. Mother is weak, and she is thirsty for MSNBC, Chris Matthews, Larry King, the energy to read her email, and the energy to phone friends. She is so ready to sit in the lobby of Canyon View and work with her new friends on the jigsaw puzzle. She is still shocked that walking and standing are so hard, and she will always be such an unassuming person that she will never understand why her friends might want to read what I write. In fact, I think a few have already asked her who is interested in this drivel.

In the meantime, I hope Mama's friends will tolerate my musings while I search for better content, like Dora's mama's potato soup recipe, or 2009 photos of the James Boulevard Giving Joy to Others House that gave Mother and me a reason to park the car and pause, as we both readied ourselves for her transition from Memorial Hospital to a health care facility.

Blogging by private people

Blogging by private people may be an oxymoron, but when confronted with the enormity of communicating about the health of an individual loved by many, it provides a personal way to share a story with those who want to follow.

On Thursday, May 28, Brad called to let me know that Mother, "Honey" had a deep vein thrombosis (a blood clot) in her leg, and that Patti, my sister-in-law was with her. She also had some signs of an infection somewhere in her body.


Mother has a wonderful doctor in Chattanooga, Dr. Sowell, who made immediate arrangements to get her into Memorial Hospital, and our family is so grateful for his attention to the immediacy of her needs. As so many of Mother's friends would attest, her needs are never apparent on the surface, and Dr. Sowell understood that her best care would be in the hopital.


While Mother never dreamed that she would go directly from Dr. Sowell's office to Memorial Hospital, it was a seamless transition thanks to Patti, who transported Mother there, got her packed, communicated with Brad and me, and helped us understand that this was exactly the right solution. Brad and I are both so very lucky that Patti was with her.

Recently, Mother visited me in Birmingham, and was feeling bad the whole time she was here. She had very little energy, didn't feel like talking, and had trouble sleeping due to the leg cramps that plague her at night. The leg cramps were severe and constant, keeping her up and down all night. She is now wondering if the leg cramps could have caused the blood clot.

While we may never know what caused the clot, we are sure it is an unwelcome visitor in an already complicated health landscape. Mother's kidney disease puts tight constraints on the amount of anti-inflammatories she can take to relieve her ever present joint pain. The blood clot treatment, coumadin, takes this limited relief to zero. Dr. Sowell explained that it can take four or more months to dissolve the blood clot and that she will have to take the coumadin for at least six months.

At Memorial, Mother had very good care, and very bland food, even on May 29th, her birthday. She has a taste bud that can detect artificial sweetener a mile away, so even the jello was a disappointment. I don't know how a person survives in a hospital if they can't eat the jello. Brad and I were both ready to sneak in food she likes, but she did not have much of an appetite. Her tiredness was great, and seems to have stemmed from a too low heart rate and fluctuating blood pressure. Dr. Sowell thought this was a side effect of one of her blood pressure medications, and was able to take her off the beta blocker. By Friday, her heart rate had improved, and we thought she might be able to leave the hospital. She had a terrific headache on Friday and still had some fluctuation with the blood pressure. Ultimately, we waited until Saturday. Dr. Sowell gave her a choice of returning to her apartment with home health visits to administer a temporary medication (a stomach injection of Lovenox that augments the coumadin until it reaches the desired level) or going to the health care unit at Alexian. This was a very difficult decision for Mother, but she ultimately decided to go to the health care unit where she could get her injections and daily bloodwork.

One of the health care professionals at Alexian -- Ruskin -- works full time assisting residents make the transition from the hospital to the health care unit. Ruskin came to the hospital on Friday, answered all questions about the transition, and helped get all the paperwork together so that Mother could go straight into a room once she arrived at Alexian. Ruskin told us he was a nurse at the health care center before taking this position as the liaison. It was apparent that he is a natural in this role.

I only had the opportunity to meet two of Mother's nurses at Memorial, Amanda and Cortney. They were both great, as were the aides and other staff who cared for Mother. There was an information board in Mother's room where the nurses posted their names when shifts changed, and other information about the patient, like diet and any other restrictions. My niece Rachel spotted the board immediately, and drew a get well message full of hearts and artisticly sprinkled dots. One night, Mother and I watched Cortney carefully erase and change the pertinent information without removing any of Rachel's art. Mother smiled and said that all the nurses and aides quietly condensed their information into the reduced space, and carefully erased each time.